Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Sorry...

It's been a long time since I've posted a cool blog, but you know the rigors of teaching heavily outweigh the rigors of blogging. I don't know when I'll get the internet set up at my apartment, so no clue as to when the next time I will be posting is. I could have said some really cool stuff about the hurricanes and all that too...dang...

Thursday, August 04, 2005

Proof That the World is Nuts

In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death.
(Like THAT makes sense.)

In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror.
(Do they look different reversed?)

Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers. The sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.
(A brick??)

The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation.
(Much worse than "going blind!")

There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time
Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry.
(Let's just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere else in the world that even comes close to this?)

In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands. The husband's illicit lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.
(Ah! Justice!)

Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England - but only in tropical fish stores.
(But of course!)

In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act.
(Makes one shudder at the thought.)

In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.
(I presume this was a big enough problem that they had to pass this law?)

In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: Prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only "in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises."
(Is this a great country or what? Well . . . not as great as Guam!)

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
(Who volunteers for that study?)

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(Is that why Flipper was always smiling?)

The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.
(From drinking little bottles of what??)

Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Ah, geez, did the government pay for this research??)

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
(I know some people like that.)

Starfish don't have brains.
(I know some people like that, too.)

And, the best for last
Turtles can breathe through their butts.
(And I thought I had bad breath in the morning!)

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Insurgents

"Today, this editorial board resolves to sacrifice another word -- 'insurgent' -- on the altar of precise language. No longer will we refer to suicide bombers or anyone else in Iraq who targets and kills children and other innocent civilians as 'insurgents.' The notion that these murderers in any way are nobly rising up against a sitting government in a principled fight for freedom has become, on its face, absurd. They drove that point home with chilling clarity Wednesday in a poor Shiite neighborhood. As children crowded around U.S. soldiers handing out candy and toys in a gesture of good will, a bomb-laden SUV rolled up and exploded. These children were not collateral damage. They were targets. The SUV driver was no insurgent. He was a terrorist. People who set off bombs on London trains are not insurgents. We would never think of calling them anything other than what they are -- terrorists. Words have meanings. Whether too timid, sensitive or 'open-minded,' we've resisted drawing a direct line between homicidal bombers everywhere else in the world and the ones who blow up Iraqi civilians or behead aid workers. No more. To call them 'insurgents' insults every legitimate insurgency in modern history. They are terrorists." --The Dallas Morning News

Welfare Office

A guy walks into the local welfare office, marches straight up to the counter and says, "Hi... You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job."

The social worker behind the counter says, "Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur and bodyguard for his nymphomaniac daughter. You'll have to drive around in his Mercedes or his Rolls, but he'll supply all of your clothes, credit cards and money. Because of the long hours, meals will be provided.
You'll be expected to escort the beautiful daughter on her overseas holiday trips.
You will have to satisfy her sexual urges. You'll have a two-bedroom apartment above the garage. The starting salary is $200,000 a year."

The guy says, "You're bullshittin' me!"

The social worker says, "Yeah, well, you started it".

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Can I Live?

"...(A)ccording to a CBS/New York Times poll cited in the article, 49% of 18-29 year old women believed that abortion should be "available to anyone who wants it" in 1993. In 2003 among the same age group, only 35% of respondents believed abortion should be "available to anyone who wants it." In 2005, only 28% of respondents favored making abortion "available to anyone who wants it."
Furthermore, in 1993, 30% of female respondents in the 18-29 year old age group believed that abortion should be "available, but with stricter limits." By 2005, the number had risen to 40%.
Most encouraging of all, only 19% of respondents in 1993 believed that abortion should be "not permitted." By 2005, the number had risen to 30%." -- RedState

Abortion is one of those topics that really gets me fired up. I bounced back and forth on the position for quite some time before finally settling in on a hard right position. Since then I haven't looked back. Anytime I hear something about the topic I make a mental note of what was said and who said it. I realize that the statistics above can only be taken with a grain of salt, but I have noticed something more concrete. I recently heard a song by an upcoming singer/songwriter/actor by the name of Nick Cannon. You might remember him from his breakout role in the movie "Drumline," he's also in the upcoming "Underclassman." Well aparently Nick wrote this song to his mother who at a young point in her life was faced with a decision of whether to have a baby at 17 or to pay 300 dollars and have her problem removed. We all have choices we must make in life and we all have to live with the responsibilities that go along with those choices. Since Roe v Wade was decided in 1973, well over 40,000,000 abortions have been performed in this country. How many Nick Cannon's are in that number that were denied thier right to life? How many Bill Gates' have we lost under the knife? Below are the lyrics to the song I mentioned. When it started I expected a completely different outcome and was so moved that I almost had a cry moment. Nick Cannon has just earned a spot on my list of artists to support.

[Nick Talking]
Talking MaI know the Situation is Personal
but it something that has to be toldas i was making this beat
you was all i could think about you heard my voice
[Verse 1]
Yeah Just think Just Think
what if you could Just
Just blink your self away..
Just Just wait just pause for a second
Let me plead my case
Its the late 70's Huh
You Seventeen huh
and having me that will ruin everything huh
its alot of angels waiting for there wings
you see me in your sleep so you cant kill your dreams
300 Dollars thats the price of living what?
Mommy i dont like this clinic
hopefully you'll make the right decision
and dont go though with the Knife Incision
but it hard to make the right move
when you in high school
how you got to work all day and take night school
hopping off da bus when the rain is pouring
What you want morning sickness or the Sickness of morning
[Chorus]
I'll Always Be apart of you
Trust Your Soul Know His Heart Is True
If I Could Talk I'd Say To You
CAN I LIVE
CAN I LIVE
I'll Always Be apart of you
Trust Your Soul Know His Heart Is True
If I Could Talk I'd Say To You
CAN I LIVE
CAN I LIVE
[Verse 2]
I' am a child of the king
aint no need to go fear me
and i see the flowing tears so know that you hear me
when i move in your womb that's me being scaring
cause who knows what my future holds
yo the truth be told you aint told a soul
yo you aint even showing im just 2 months old
though your clothes try to hide me deny
me went up 3 sizes
your pride got you lying saying aint nothing but a migraine
it aint surprising you not trying to be in wick food lines
your friends look at you funny but look at you mommy
thatz a life inside take a look at your tummy
what is becoming ma i am Oprah bound
you can tell he's a star from the Ultrasound
Our Sprits Connected Doors Open Now
Nothing But Love And Respect Thanks For Holding Me Down She Let Me Live...
[Chorus]
I'll Always Be apart of you
Trust Your Soul Know His Heart Is True
If I Could Talk I'd Say To You
CAN I LIVE
CAN I LIVE
I'll Always Be apart of you
Trust Your Soul Know His Heart Is True
If I Could Talk I'd Say To You
CAN I LIVE
CAN I LIVE
[Nick Talking]
Its uplifting foreal yall
i aint passing no judgement
aint making no decisions
I am just telling ya'll my story
I love life
I love my mother for giving me life
we all need to appreciate life
a strong woman that had to make a sacrifice
Thanks for listening
Thanks for listening
Mama thanks for listening

Thursday, July 14, 2005

Down Size Me

As reported on FoxNews.com
In his 2004 documentary "Super Size Me," filmmaker Morgan Spurlock ate at McDonald's for a month and gained 25 pounds.
Maybe he didn't eat there long enough. Another Morgan — Merab Morgan of Henderson, N.C. — has lost 33 pounds after more than two months on a McDonald's-only diet.
Mickey D's is affordable, the 35-year-old woman explained, and nearly every franchise posts a chart, also available on the Web, listing the calories in each menu item.
So Morgan simply memorized the chart, and now calculates how many calories each meal will be before she goes to the drive-through window.
"I just [stay] anywhere between 1,200 and 1,400 calories a day," she told WRAL-TV of Raleigh.
That's well under the 1,800 to 2,200 calories nutritionists deem the "replacement value" for a healthy adult, and far less than the 3,500 daily calories Morgan told the Raleigh News & Observer she had been eating prior to the diet.
Morgan, who's raising two kids alone and works in construction, spends between $9 and $11 per day on food, sometimes ordering all three meals at once.
At 5-foot-9, she's down to 195 pounds and has gone from a size 24 to a size 15.
Barry Popkin, a nutritionist at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill's School of Public Health, doubted that Morgan was getting enough minerals, fibers and vitamins, but admired her for devising a system that works.
"She's created, for her lifestyle, a very smart diet," Popkin told the News & Observer. "The moral of the story for every person is [that] you've got to work out a plan that fits your lifestyle."
Morgan would like to be the McDonald's version of Jared Fogle, the young man who lost weight on Subway sandwiches.
But she added that the company's attitude toward customer solicitation was basically, "We appreciate all your good ideas, but keep them to yourself."

End Story

In watching Morgan Spurlock's documentary on McDonald's I found myself in quite the quandry. All through the film I was intensly craving some food from McD's, but at the same time I never wanted to eat there again. Being a rational person, I know that the results in "Super Size Me" were exaggerated for the purpose of shock value, so that film didn't stop me from consuming those delicious delectables.

The above story provides the perfect example of what happens when someone is personally responsible for their actions. Many of the people Spurlock interviews and talks about in "Super Size Me" are looking for someone else to blame for their weight. Above we have a lady who realizes what it takes to lose weight. It doesn't take congressional action against McDonald's. It doesn't take a multi-million dollar settlement. All it takes is personal responsibility. You know what things you are putting into your body, and if you don't, it's your responsibility to find out. This woman's story is the anti-thesis to Spurlock's film.

I saw an episode of the ESPN show "Teammates" where NFL wide reciever Chad Johnson claimed that he eats at McDonald's virtually every day after practice. That makes two examples of people who benefit from their McDonald's intake. One is an obese woman who has found a way to lose weight eating the foods that she loves and one is the pinnacle of human athleticism who burns that fat and energy in grueling NFL practices and workouts.

Now, Spurlock is on to other subjects. The cable channel F/X has given him his own series called "30 days" where he tracks people being taken out of their comfort zones for a month and living new experiences. I recently saw an interview with someone who was claiming that the results of the show aren't what they seem. This person claimed that there is a predetermined outcome to each episode. It seems this person was supposed to be the subject of the episode concerning American Muslims. He was told before the experience began that throughout he will gain an appreciation and understanding for the difficulties that are inherent in being a Muslim in America. He objected to being the subject, because he didn't think it was right predetermining how he was supposed to feel at the end of an experience that is supposed to be documentary in nature. It all just goes to show you that if you persuasive enough you can always put forth the evidence to prove your point. It's no different in the world of documentary film-making.

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

College Dropout

It's official, I'm getting rid of my College Dropout cd. On July 2, 2005, Kanye West appeared on the Philadelphia bill of Live 8, using the global platform to refer to "man-made diseases placed in African communities", a reference to the belief that AIDS was created by Westerners to exterminate Africans. I haven't ever heard of this before in my life. How much credibility does this theory hold? What would be the benefit to Westerners from wiping out Africa? How about other major catastrophic diseases? The Black Plague? Polio? Were these also intentionally released by maniacal scientists bent on taking over the world? I know that germ warfare exists and is a very real thing and there are credible examples, such as Europeans infecting Native American tribes with smallpox, but AIDS? Europeans were already resistant to the smallpox virus when they passed it to the Natives so there was a very positive upside for them. The natives would get sick and weak and were easily defeated. NO ONE is immune to the HIV virus. What's the point in purposefully infecting one culture when it can be easily spread to your own?
He also criticised Western leaders, but not African leaders, for "riding in their Bentleys and Benzs", even though he himself has a collection of 12 cars and is a very rich individual. Kanye is one of those insufferable "blame someone else for my condition" types. He also made the statement at the Live 8 interview that crack cocaine was intentionally placed in the inner city by whites in order to break up the cohesiveness of the Black Panthers. What has happened to personal responsibility in this country? I've seen people who smoke crack and they don't look so hot. That's why I don't smoke it. Most of the people who I know that smoke weed are losers. That's why I don't smoke it. Most of the alcoholics I've known have pretty sucky lives. That's why I don't make it a habit of over indulging with alcohol.
I feel bad for starving kids in Africa, I really do, but is it our government's fault that those kids are starving? Don't they have a government? Why is this area of the world worth pitying more than any other area? I love how liberals get to play both sides on everything. With regards to Iraq and Afghanistan, America is an interventionist bully pushing it's will upon other countries doing no one any good, but somehow throwing money into the hands of corrupt African governments that allow their people to starve to death is going to solve the solution to the world's poor. Thanks Kanye, and the rest of the Live 8 performers for bringing so much attention and focus to an unsolvable problem.

Friday, July 01, 2005

Swing Judge No Longer


It’s finally happened. Bush is finally going to get a crack at nominating a judge to the Supreme Court. Sandra Day O’Connor has announced her intention to step down later this summer in a personally delivered letter to the President. O’Connor has her place in history reserved however, being the first woman ever appointed to the largest court in the land. Throughout her tenure on the court O’Connor has been a swing vote on virtually every decision. No one ever knew which way she was going to lean. She kept the democrats from stealing the election in 2000. She’s consistently voted “pro-choice” on abortion. Just recently she was in the minority vote along with Rehnquist, Scalia, and Thomas in the decision for Kelo vs. New London. John Paul Stevens's majority opinion provoked a strongly worded dissent from Justice Sandra Day O'Connor, who wrote that the ruling favors the most powerful and influential in society and leaves small property owners little recourse. Now, she wrote, the "specter of condemnation hangs over all property. Nothing is to prevent the State from replacing any Motel 6 with a Ritz-Carlton, any home with a shopping mall, or any farm with a factory." As part of my American Constitutional History course in college we read The Majesty of the Law by O’Connor. It’s actually a really good read. She gives a good history of the Supreme Court and it’s most influential justices. She also puts forth some really good ideas about tort reform. I thought it would be boring as crap, but it goes by surprisingly fast.

Things don’t look to good with regards to Bush putting someone who is more conservative than O’Connor on the stand. Look at the recent filibusters. It doesn’t warm my heart any to have conservatives back down from their position of power and compromise on appointees. Word on the street is that Rehnquist will soon retire as well. Rehnquist is a strict constitutionalist, conservative. Filling his shoes will be a big duty. It’s too bad one of the four crazy liberal judges couldn’t step down…in my dreams.

Forehead for Sale


Have you ever really asked yourself how much money it would take for you to become a walking billboard? Being the capitalist, money-hungry, pig-dog that I am, I have given this question some thought. Most pro athletes are basically billboards for different sporting companies. Remember the fuss when Tiger switched to playing with Nike clubs? If a company was willing to give me loads of free stuff for their own advertising purposes and it was a company that I liked, I would do it without hesitation. What I wouldn't do however, is tattoo a company's name on my FACE! I'm a big fan of tattoos, don't get me wrong. I have three myself. This lady's just gone a little too far...

SALT LAKE CITY (AP) — For $10,000, Kari Smith has had her forehead tattooed with the Web address of a gambling site.
Smith, 30, who sold her unusual advertising space on eBay, said the money will give her 11-year-old son a private education, which she believes he needs after falling behind in school.
"For the all the sacrifices everyone makes, this is a very small one," she said. "It's a small sacrifice to build a better future for my son," she said.
"To everyone else, it seems like a stupid thing to do. To me, $10,000 is like $1 million. I only live once, and I'm doing it for my son," she said.
Tattoo artist Don Brouse said he and his staff spent nearly seven hours Wednesday trying to talk Smith out of putting "GoldenPalace.com" above her face.
When he did go through with it, he kept the inch-tall letters close to her hairline, where bangs or a hat could provide some cover.
Smith's eBay auction attracted more than 27,000 hits and 1,000 watchers. Bidding reached $999.99 before Goldenpalace.com, an Internet gambling company in the Mohawk Territory of Kahnawake, Canada, met Smith's $10,000 asking price.